*Dr. Rodolfo John Ortiz Teope, PhD, EdD, DM
Mayor Atienza has earned countless distinctions throughout his life. He served as of former Manila Mayor, Congressman, and Department of Environment and Natural Resources Secretary and has long been recognized as a patriot, a leader, and a statesman. These are achievements that any public servant would be proud of. Yet as I looked at the couple celebrating six decades of marriage, I realized that perhaps the greatest achievement of all was not the offices he held or the awards he received. It was the family they built together.
Sixty years.
Just saying those words carries a different kind of weight.
A marriage that has survived six decades is not built on romance alone. It is built on patience, forgiveness, sacrifice, respect, loyalty, and an unwavering decision to choose each other every single day. It is the kind of achievement that cannot be bought, inherited, or manufactured. It is earned through thousands of ordinary days and countless moments when love becomes a choice rather than merely a feeling.
As I watched them surrounded by their children and grandchildren, I could not help but admire not only the longevity of their marriage but also the life they had created together. Their children have each pursued their own paths and achieved success in their respective professions. More importantly, they have grown within a family whose foundation remained intact despite the passing of time.
Today, such stories seem increasingly rare.
Nakalulungkot isipin na sa panahon ngayon, parang mas mabilis nang matapos ang isang relasyon kaysa mabuo ito. Maraming mag-asawa ang naghihiwalay. Maraming magkasintahan ang sumusuko. May mga babaeng iniiwan ang kanilang asawa para sa ibang lalaki, at mayroon ding mga lalaking ginagawa rin ang ganoon. Ang iba naman ay paulit-ulit na pumapasok sa iba’t ibang relasyon na tila ba naging normal na lamang ang pagpapalit ng kapareha.
Hindi ko ito sinasabi upang husgahan ang sinuman. Alam kong bawat tao ay may sariling kwento, sariling sugat, at sariling laban. Ngunit bilang isang taong nakasaksi ng isang animnapung taong pagsasama, hindi ko maiwasang itanong sa aking sarili: Ano ang nangyari sa konsepto ng panghabambuhay na pagmamahalan?
Perhaps our generation has become very good at finding people but not necessarily building relationships.
Technology has made introductions easier than ever. Dating applications promise compatibility through algorithms. Blind dates are organized almost every week. Social media allows us to meet strangers from every corner of the world with just one click.
Yet despite having thousands of ways to connect, many people have never felt more alone.
Worse, some individuals no longer enter relationships because they genuinely seek love. Instead, they seek opportunity. Dating applications have become hunting grounds for scammers. Some borrow money and disappear without a trace. Others introduce investment opportunities that eventually turn out to be fraudulent. Some simply manipulate emotions for financial gain or personal convenience.
Nakakalungkot isipin na pati pag-ibig ay minsan nagiging negosyo.
Parang umiikot na lamang ang mundo sa pera, convenience, at pansamantalang kasiyahan.
I sometimes wonder whether we have unintentionally replaced commitment with convenience. The moment relationships become difficult, people simply move on to the next one. Instead of repairing what is broken, many choose to replace it.
Perhaps that is why the word monthsary has become more popular than golden anniversary. We celebrate one month together, but rarely imagine celebrating fifty or sixty years together.
Maybe we have become impatient.
Maybe we have forgotten that true love is not found in perfect people but is built by imperfect people willing to grow together.
As a single father, these thoughts naturally become personal.
Like anyone else, I also dream of having someone to grow old with. Someone who understands without lengthy explanations. Someone who remains during difficult seasons instead of leaving when life becomes inconvenient. Someone who celebrates victories but also stays during failures.
But life has taught me that searching is not always the same as finding.
There have been opportunities that led nowhere. There have been people who entered my life only to leave. There were disappointments, misunderstandings, and moments when trust was broken. There are people who enter relationships not because they want to build a future but because they want to use another person for their own benefit.
Those experiences could easily make anyone close the door forever.
Yet perhaps that is not the lesson.
Perhaps the lesson is simply not to force what is not meant to be.
Minsan iniisip ko, baka mas maganda pa noon. Panahong may harana, may mahabang ligawan, may paghingi ng basbas sa magulang, at may konserbatibong pagtingin sa pagmamahal. Hindi man perpekto ang nakaraan, ngunit may pagpapahalaga sa commitment na tila unti-unting nawawala ngayon.
Today, many young people are exposed to a culture where instant gratification often replaces lasting commitment. Social media constantly presents unrealistic expectations. Western entertainment frequently glorifies temporary relationships while lifelong commitment receives less attention. Premarital sex has become increasingly common among the youth, teenage pregnancies continue to rise, and many relationships begin quickly but end just as quickly.
The challenge before us is not simply to preserve marriage as an institution but to restore the values that make marriage worth preserving.
Looking again at Mayor Lito Atienza and Mrs. Beng Atienza, I realized that perhaps their greatest legacy is not political.
It is their example.
An example that lasting love is still possible.
An example that commitment can survive changing times.
An example that family remains the greatest investment a person can ever make.
Will many couples today reach sixty years together?
Honestly, I do not know.
But I sincerely hope many still will.
As for me, I may never experience a 60th wedding anniversary. Life has taken me on a different journey. Today, my greatest love remains my daughter, and being her father is one of the greatest blessings God has entrusted to me.
Still, I refuse to close my heart completely.
Hindi ibig sabihin na single tayo ay malungkot na tayo. Maraming single ang masaya, fulfilled, at matagumpay sa kanilang buhay. Ngunit totoo rin na may kakaibang ganda ang magkaroon ng taong tunay na nagmamahal, nagmamalasakit, at nananatili sa tabi mo sa lahat ng pagkakataon.
Perhaps we should stop chasing love as though it were a transaction.
Perhaps we should stop believing that every swipe will lead us to our soulmate.
Perhaps we should stop forcing relationships simply because society tells us we should never be alone.
Instead, let life unfold naturally.
If someone is truly meant to walk beside us, that person will arrive—not because of pressure, not because of loneliness, not because of algorithms or blind dates, but because two hearts are genuinely ready to build a life together.
Real love cannot be downloaded.
It cannot be rushed.
It cannot be purchased.
And it certainly cannot be sustained by deception.
It grows quietly, patiently, and faithfully—just as it did for Mayor Lito and Mrs. Beng Atienza over the past sixty years.
Perhaps that is the kind of love still worth waiting for.
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Dear friends,
*About the author:
